Rewriting Captain Marvel

Why bother you ask? Because... why not? So, I'm going to re-write what Captain Marvel film should have, could have been. Here goes.


Casting change for the main roll: Milla Jovovich

Why? Shes' talented, and she kicked butt back in the day.

So I'm pretty sure she could pull it off.


Now how I would structure the movie:


~~~~


First, lets start it from her as a kid, she gets knocked down by a boy, and cries, her dad rushes to her side and says "Get up," and she looks at him, and he just looks at her, slowly she stands. "Wipe those tears away," he tells her. She does. He nods approval and walks off, as he does, the scene fades into a transition to her as a teen, kneeling at his grave to place a flower, "No tears," she says, "I'm... not crying..." she walks away and it fades to her older, training for the Air-force  where she falls off a rope, "GET UP" the instructor yells, she pounds the earth next to her, gets up and climbs the rope to the top, others cheer but she looks very muted in emotion, stern, hard, cold.


She is learning to fly, as we see she is approached by a woman who asks to be friends with her.

"Why bother being friends?" she asks rhetorically, "They just weaken you, if you fall, you have to get up on your own."


She smiles, "I'll help you up," she offers her hand, and we see her smile for the first time. The two are shown bonding over serous and fun times, hard work - a training sequence with fighter jets flying around zoom - zoom! Fast, fun, we see them thumb up each other. Then the plane with her friend in it, suddenly explodes.


Shocked, Carol Danvers looks up and sees an alien ship. She flies at it to combat it, and in a flash of light, her plane vanish's.


Screen darkens and when light comes up we see her being experimented upon, strange liquid flowing into her, things zapping her, probes and so on.


When we next see her, she is awakened by one of the Kree from the Guardian of the Galaxy movies - not the main one but one of the minions - he is the one who trains her and tells her that she was attacked by Skrulls and experimented on, and they saved her. She works with them and they go on missions to fight the Skrulls. Her powers start to emerge slowly as she is being trained to use them and control them by her mentor.



A rumor that a number of Skrulls are on Earth is over heard by Carol (who her mentor has renamed Marvel)


She asks to come along and he refuses without explaining why. She boards the ship as a stowaway anyway and they arrive at earth, scanning for Skrulls, when one of the Skrulls ships de-cloaks and blasts them, sending them falling into the sky, the ship is breaking apart and she bails out, activating her powers to soften her landing.


She crashes into a building and a few moments latter gets up, she wipes away a tear from her face, wondering what it is aloud. A man walks into the room, "What are you doing here the gamma..?" he asks - its Bruce Banner, this is his lab she has crashed into. She doesn't explain and rushes towards him, ready to fight, "Lady no!" he screams holding up his arm to block her, she slams on him, "No - please... my - you don't want to see me an...grrryyyy!" he becomes Hulk to her shock, and punches her though the wall, as she tumbles to the ground we hear "ROAR" and more destruction as the Hulk goes smashing things somewhere else.


She lays there, we hear her fathers voice "Get up." she begins to slowly remember, looking back at her memories from her adult point of view, but also from an outsider, not really understanding she is watching her own memories, "Whoever that kid is, her father is helping her," she says out loud, "Hes teaching her to get up, knowing that life is hard, to not cry unless its time to cry... she doesn't understand that..." she sees herself and her friend, and the plane explode, and herself being experimented on, her eyes open and she sees out of them, her mentor overseeing her experiments... now she knows its her, and her memory and that she was lied to.


On the ground we see her open her eyes, and they shine green for a moment, as her powers flow over her she gets up, "I'll have my revenge..." she swears and begins to run.


We see her running faster and faster as her powers grow, "Get...up..." she says - then she jumps - and flies into the sky. She smiles. She flies around until she sees the downed Kree ship and lands.


She demands answers from her mentor who lies more to cover it up. She blasts him with her powers, but he withstands it, he rushes inside of the downed ship, and launch's an escape pod, the blast of the engine burring down upon her. But, rather then hurt her, it just fuels her power more, the pod launches into space and she flies up after it, in space the pod is grabbed by a ship that then launches into one of the warp hex's. She follows after them, wondering in her mind about the Skrulls on earth, and flies back down.


She is then seen walking down the streets and enters a building that has an advertisement for a "way to contact anyone" she finds a pager and asks about it, after its explained to her she runs off with it, causing them to call the police on her, but she flies away and they do not see her go.


She uses her powers to infuse the device with energy and to enhance it. She then asks around about where someone in charge would be, and finally gets told to ask about the FBI or something. She is seen putting the pager into an envelope with FBI written on the outside, and placing it into a mail box. She also includes a warning about the Skrulls. Having satisfied herself that she has warned this planet, she goes into space, entering the hex she vanish's.


We flash forward to some point in time, agent Furry is given the pager asked to figure out what its all about, He then gets into a car with the other SHIELD agent. As he sees things go to hell he feels the pager go off - and realizes he is dying, "Mother fu--" he says as he turns to dust, we see the pager has the symbol of our hero on it, perhaps she knows what happened, and is coming back.


~~~~~~~~


There. I fixed it. It needs more fleshing out of course, but I think that this is a much better version then what we got. Agree, disagree? How would you do it? Let me know in the comments below! Wait no this isn't youtube.. how does this thing work anyway? :D

Blurryman: The Twilight Zone done RIGHT.

Last time on this blog! 

Blurryman.

Not yet out. I predict that man will be blurry and also evil and bad because men are bad.

Might come back to edit this whenever episode comes out. Hate watching is a thing I guess.

~~~~

I'm so glad to be wrong for a change. I'm super, mega happy! This - THIS is a great episode. No "message" no over the top pandering, just solid story telling from start to the end.Also, and not to spoil the episode, but after you watch it, go ahead and go back to episode one of the series, and look at time index 12:03 - holy shit. They did it. Oh my word. Well done. Well, bloody done. 

So, I'm sure that its there in other episodes and someone will point it out, but that someone is not me. The ending credits is a nice touch. So, a great way to end this session, and perhaps series in case the ratings are not that great. So, moving forward are we going to get less message shows? I really hope so, that's what is being hinted at in a way here. Yes, Zone had some messages - but they were not so over blown and in your face. If done right - the message is part of the story and the message isn't just shoved in your face like you are dumb. I think that is what set me off last time. Even when I enjoyed the episodes, the message gets in the way of that enjoyment. 

Still, if they are saying that Zone is BACK - then that is a really good thing, and I'll be watching to see if they deliver on this promise that is hidden in plain sight.... here in the Twilight Zone.

Welcome to the WOKE Zone?

There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man. Women. It is a dimension as vast as social justice and as timeless as feminism. It is the middle ground between sleeping  and woke, between patriarchy and white cis-men, and it lies between the pit of all fears and the summit of her knowledge....

Well, I've been watching the new Twilight Zone, and I'm starting to get vibes that this is woke/sjw/feminist/npc ideology being shoved in our faces. At least, I'm not the only one who thinks this might be the case (WOKEZONE)(Morewoke)

I was at first thinking, nah.. I'm just reading into it. But, then I was like - maybe not. Spoilers ahead.

What is each episode "About" not what it shows us, but what sinister motive might be hidden in plain sight? What is the MESSAGE? Remember Twilihgt Zone (TZ from now on) was sometimes a message show, not always - but back in the day it did feature some commentary on social issues, and hey, that is fine - as long as its done well, and done with you asking questions.

Let me recap what I think the message is of every episode.

The Comedian.

A male must use his own friends & family to make people laugh, when he does they die (vanish) The punchline? He can only win by killing himself. 

The implication here is that comedians are only funny because they USE people, and that the only funny punchline is when they give it up. Even the woman in the end will go down that dark road. Because screw comedy it just makes fun of people.

Nightmare at 30,000 Feet.

The real monster on the plane is the two men who the woman doesn't manage to control goes insane. The male lets the other male take over the plane and it crashes into island from Lost. The podcast that was telling the males future tells him that he was the only one who didn't make it back - everyone else (other then the insane male pilot I guess who the podcast seems to have forgotten) all are really angry at him, because its his fault, and form a mob to kill him. Why? Because he ruined there flight and destroyed there belongings? I mean, really - that is all the consequence is - no one is dead, no one even looks that hurt. But they all group gang up and kill him. I guess he is a male and that is a crime enough. I would have given this a pass if Shatner had been the crazy guy to take over the plane and fly it into space or something crazy. The pod cast being from the future that although the guy plays it for the flight marshal woman - she doesn't believe him (?!) in the original the guy is seen as going crazy or is the only sane one - there isn't any other message other then weird stuff can happen. This one, I think has a message: group violence is okay ageist the male who ruined your day.

Replay.

Subtleness jumps out the window to its doom and dies a horrible death.
White cop is racist. Doesn't matter if you have magical time travel. Racists will always hate you, you can not reason with them, you can not make yourself more human to them, they will get you in the end, best be scared forever and all time and also they are unreasonable and out to get you because you are black and racist white men!!!! Black lives matter hashtag. Yeah this was those two links I put - there are more articles saying much the same. This is the most woke yet. GET IT CUSS RACISM.

A Traveler.

Aliens take over and I guess make the Native people in charge because it would be better that way. Down with the people that took the Native lands! Aliens are here to take it back for you! YAY! At least we know what happened to Glen now. He's become an alien. Sure, why not. Also he is the good guy right? I mean, he gives the land back to the Natives. Eats a pie with one. Its so good.

The Wunderkind.

The president is nothing more then a spoiled child who will kill us all via his bad choices. ORANGE MAN BAD GET IT?

Six Degrees of Freedom.

Wow, a non-message show? Wait no you'll destroy my whole hypothesis! Noooo! Well, okay so this one a guy says they are all in a test but he is mansplaining to the women leaders so they ignore him and he dies (or so they think) they land on Mars, but the whole thing is a test. Humans passed, and even the guy figured out it was a test whoa that never happens. So - wow, this has no subtext. Darn it. Lets call this one the odd one out and all agree that it needed more women. I guess you could say that putting all the women in charge is pretty woke, but that's not much of a woke. So, this episode should get much hate because of that. Try being more woke next time darn it.

Not All Men.

I think you forgot the hashtag there #notallmen - much better. So all the men go crazy due to rocks that poison the water - BUT WAIT! No the rocks don't do anything (?!) and the men are just using that as an excuse to go crazy (and have eyes turn red and get super strong, WTF?!) Anyway, one guy who is GAY decides to not let it happen, (He just doesn't become evil because you can deside to not become evil from the rocks but the rocks do not do anything real anyway but they do but they don't?!) because not all men are super evil.... just most men. (Cis-men clearly are evil) Women beware, all that stops men from going crazy is no rocks raining from the sky or something something I guess. Woke level here is at great levels. 

Point of Origin.

BORDERS ARE BAD!! Illegals need our love!!!! Hows it feel to be the outsider?! Doesn't matter if the place you came from is horrible - your not ONE OF US. So how dare you live here? GET OUT OF MY HOUSE and off my land! Build that wall! Torture and capture and imprison them! RARRRRR SO MUCH WOKE HERE OMG!!!1111. Ice cream man is nice, but isn't effective, other woman gets away because she knows not to trust ANYONE from here because they will turn you in. Message is clear here: boarder bad. Feel bad for the illegal person wah wah sniff sniff.

The Blue Scorpion.

Guns are bad and will kill SOMEONE so best make sure its not you. I guess... This one almost feels like it isn't really saying that guns are bad per-say, but that objects are like, bad? Or... uh.. its really not clear. Is the gun magical? Are all objects magical? This might not really have any message to be fair, but darn it my hypothesis is that this show is woke so I'm going with the "guns are bad" message that one could extract from this episode. To be fair, I don't like guns myself - but I dislike having a message shoved into my face as well. Still, its not a bad episode, just make sure it gets light. Also teach kids gun safety wtf is up with that ending?! The one kid points a loaded gun at the other kid!? WTF. Best look at the flower kid, At least we didn't hear a gun shot at the end before the wrap up speech. 


Blurryman.

Not yet out. I predict that man will be blurry and also evil and bad because men are bad.
Might come back to edit this whenever episode comes out. Hate watching is a thing I guess.
~~~~

So, sure I'm digging in deep here, and that is kinda the point. Is this woke? Is this need be more woke? Message shows always bad or just sometimes bad? What are your thoughts? Be sure to leave a comment or something to let me know... no one has done that for my other blogs yet but this time because I'm posting things that people might disagree with they will maybe!! Who knows. See you out there in the Outer Limits. Wait, no wrong show.

You can't answer this question... therefor...

If you are around theists enough, you will have seen this, or something like this before:

5 Questions Every Person Must Answer

10 questions atheists can't answer.

15 questions only (X) religion can answer.

And on it goes. Lists of things that are questions that MUST be resolved for your "world view" to be stable, remarkable, or coherent. Let me let you in on a well kept skeptical secret (that isn't a secret) .... Its not true. A world view does not, in fact, need to answer any question at all. It is, simply put - how a person - and I know this is shocking.... VIEWS THE WORLD. Sorry, I was yelling at the theists that seem to just not get it. You might also toss the "Atheism/skepticism is a world view" onto the heap of statements that you might have seen more then once and explained why that is wrong... time and again apologists must lie or be wrong about reality in order to keep faith alive.

But, I'm getting off track...

No, you do not know all the answers to any given question. And that means nothing.

Not knowing does not make the answer (X).

Nor does THINKING that your world view gives an answer for (X) mean that is the right world view.

Also, the problem with the thinking that a worldview "needs" or "must" address any given problem is - in and of itself, part of your world view. Your view of the world says that a world view needs to answer questions, you think your world view answers those questions and that other views do not therefor you are right.

Simple circular logic there.

The other problem is, that an answer can match the question, but not in fact, BE the answer.

Last, but not least, we have the fact that you could not know what an answer is, but know what the answer is NOT.

Example: I do not know what 1 billion to the power of 17 is... but I do know that the answer is not zero. I also know the answer will not be a negative number, and that it will be higher then 1 billion. I can know a lot about what the answer is not, without knowing what the answer is.

So, no - not knowing an answer means nothing.

(possible appeal to ignorance)

Thinking that you know the answer is irreverent if you can not demonstrate that the answer is in fact the answer you think it is.

And wanting an answer does not mean there is an answer, it kind of depends on the question, loaded questions for example have no answer, you must deconstruct the question and object to it, thus you can not "answer" the question because of ya know, LOGIC.

Then again, if apologists learned logic and used it...

They wouldn't be apologists anymore, they would be skeptics.

x

Someone online is wrong: Time to blog about it.

SJ Thomason: BLOG OF SO MUCH WRONG (click me for post)

Oh good. SJ Thomason has a thing that is wrong in every possible way for me to pick apart. Sigh.

Because its about Tracie Harris (who is awesome and I have a crush on) I must write about how wrong this is. Because maybe Tracie will see it, and then date me. Also I'll get one million dollars free somehow... anyway, onto this blog.

Quote:

Does God Lock the Door? 

The first “great” point that Harris makes is that she has no way to assess the “truth” of the “reality” of theist’s “claims.” She says that if one claims that there is a chair in a room, she should be able to go into the room to verify the truth on whether a chair is present as claimed. She claims that she can’t check the presence of the chair, though, because the “door is locked” so she has no “access to the chair” and she can’t “get through that locked door.” These assertions are based on the assumption that God locks the door on people.

End Quote.



This is an analogy. Rather then a door we could say it is a box with something inside the box, and no one can open the box. Then people claim that something is in the box. They will not provide anything other then the claim. So you do not, and can not know what is in the box. 

But, of course SJ runs with the door because then she gets to ignore the problem at hand and strawman the whole point being made. I'll explain...

The burden of proof is on the one making the claim.
You, and others claim there is an (X). No one can see (X) no one can test (X) there is no other way to know about (X) then a book.

Said book has additional problems: Its unscientific, its been changed over time, its been mistranslated, some of it is based on tradition rather then fact, very little of it has any support in archaeology (a handful of kings & locations)  and much of it is counter to what we know. IE: Camels
It contains stories that seem to be plagiaristic of earlier stories, it has no known authorship, AND said book is offered in a wide selection of flavors, AND people that follow the teachings of the book view the book in every possible way there is and even ways that seem impossible AND also there are other issues with the book like missing citations. Its unremarkable and seems typical for writings of its time. It was edited together in the past in a non-scientific way without any oversight and without any coherent method. Also it has a number of contradictions in it.

But yeah sure SJ go with the door because that will miss the whole point that Tracy is making that clearly went over your head and/or that you just have to strawman in effort to make your argument even work. You should call into the atheist experience sometime... oh you did.

Quote:

The Bible makes it clear

End Quote.

SJ does know what circular reasoning is right? The claim of what is behind the door (or in the box) is made in the bible. YEAH WE KNOW THAT. We do not care what the darn claims made in the bible are! SHOW US WHAT IS IN THE BOX OR BEHIND THE DOOR. Bleep me.

Also, SJ clearly has no clue who Paul is talking to (hint: its not the modern day person). Not that it matters since I do not know if Paul even existed or talked to anyone, but even if he did - again, these claims are also made about what is behind the door (in the box) that we are asking to see that the people Paul is talking to have seen (or so the story suggests) this is not, I repeat not about us.

SJ's tack is to simply make A NEW CLAIM that (non-believers/and anyone else who doesn't believe in this god) are SUPPRESSING THE TRUTH™ the fact that anyone and everyone could make this as a counter-claim to her I suspect, is not something SJ has really considered to be a problem.

SJ: You are suppressing the truth that the bible is false. You know deep down that its all a lie and just pretend its true because you are afraid of death.

Hey look I can do it as well! Everyone can!... THIS IS BAD LOGIC!!!!!!!!!!

Quote:

(1) How can Harris apply her atheistic relative moral values to make a judgment on the morality of people who lived thousands of years ago in a far different culture and context than our present culture and context?
(2) Does evil serve any purpose in this world?

End Quote.

Do you know that Harris has relative morals? What ethical system does she use? Do you know that?
You do also know that there IS NO "atheistic" ANYTHING. .... ITS NOT A WORLD VIEW!!!!!!!! Bleep me SJ should know that... but its way easier to claim that atheism is a world view if not outright then by implication. What a mess.

Your question, other then making a ton of assumptions and being loaded, also does nothing to prove your above question that you are not answering by asking more questions! You set out to show that there is proof that Harris has "locked the door to god" yet offer nothing to show this is the case. Of course, you must show there is a god to lock the door to in the first place, but that is a whole other problem on top of the problems you have! Geez! You fix all your problems with bigger problems?!

Your second question is very strange. Although its irreverent to the matter at hand, its asked as if the answer would prove a point.

I can only guess at what SJ thinks the answer is. I would just say that if anything that had a mind made it possible for evil to exist - even if there is some purpose then that mind has made evil, and the ends therefor must justify the means.

I do not personally agree with the idea that the ends justifies the means, at least not in full. Perhaps in some cases, but not in every case. What we have for Christian apologetic's is an effort to explain away why there is "evil" in the world if "god" is "good" and has "all power". The problem of evil argument only negates one type of god (most Christian's view of god). Its simply irreverent if Harris has used that argument or not - was that argument connected to the earlier door analogy? If not, who cares? Are we talking about a different argument made? I guess! Its unclear from the blog what argument we are covering here and - well, these are clips being covered... so, they are not even the full argument.

It really doesn't matter because SJ doesn't seem to understand the point Harris is making about morals. If Harris used the argument from evil or not. If Harris said her morals are better then those of your bible or your god idea. Harris might in fact, have better morals or we might ask how we can establish who has better morals. However, such things would require a good understanding of logic.

Quote:

Atheistic Relative Moral Values

End quote.

No. There are no "atheistic" anything.
Some people (who might be atheists) hold to relative moral values, some do not.
You get wrong what relative moral values are, and also make no mention of ethics. I'm going to skip most of this.

Quote:

The cultures in the Old Testament and in civilization in general during ancient times were much different than they are today. Slavery was prevalent throughout the Roman Empire and in other cultures worldwide

End quote.

This isn't a problem under relative moral values. SJ wants to have both relative and objective morals (Somehow) but if "god" knows what moral is BEST .... why not just tell people what that is?

It should not matter what the culture is like - ITS GOD. If slavery is wrong (always objectively) then God should have told the people at the time "THIS IS BAD" - God did not. So its "okay" then but not okay now. When did God say it was not okay? When did God ever say "No longer enslave people" or "Slavery is immoral" ????? Its not in your bible. So.... I guess God didn't say that did it? Therefor we, today, who think (broadly speaking) that slavery is bad... are in fact, doing better then God did. Because, unlike God - we are SAYING ITS BAD.

Quote:

Accordingly, evil does serve a purpose. Evil, self-enhancement, gender inequalities, and injustice help shape our views on what’s right. Evil helps us to appreciate the values of love, self-transcendence, human equality, and justice. Accordingly, Tracie Harris should not consider herself more moral than our Creator. He is shaping us for greatness.

End Quote

Prove this point. Do not just say it as if it is true. Show me a large scale data sample of humans that proves this is true.

Oh - you don't have that? Yeah, so this is again, a claim you have made, with no evidence to back it.

As such, we must dismiss it.

Quote:

Accordingly, evil does serve a purpose. Evil, self-enhancement, gender inequalities, and injustice help shape our views on what’s right. Evil helps us to appreciate the values of love, self-transcendence, human equality, and justice. Accordingly, Tracie Harris should not consider herself more moral than our Creator. He is shaping us for greatness.

End quote.

This is your view SJ. Assertions made without any proof to back them. I do not see here any solution to the problem of evil. The idea that a god uses evil for anything simply means that god has less knowledge then humans do. I and others would never, ever use evil for anything if we can avoid doing so. If I am in charge of making the whole of the cosmos, I would not have evil in it at all. You wouldn't need it. To "shape your view of what is right" - I thought you were pre-built with knowing what is right in your heart or something? Why would you need your view shaped - didn't God just tell you what to do or not do? This god concept becomes more and more incoherent the more you ask critical questions about it.

Your "Creator" is less moral then I am. I can not speak to what morals Tracie has per-say, as I do not know what they are, or are not, nor do I know her ethical system. If I had to guess I would guess that Tracie (based on what I recall of her saying) would not want harm to come to people, so if Tracie was able to save everyone from harm, she would. Yet Tracy does not have that sort of power. Nor do I. If I had the power to stop anything/anyone from doing (X) thing that harms (Z) thing... I would. Your god (if it exists) does not do a damn thing, in fact according to you, it lets this happen to "shape" people. How does lava exploding upon a house shape anyone when they are dead thanks to said lava?

In fact, what the bleep could we learn here and now that we can not learn in the eternal realm that you also believe in? What about the numerous counter examples where bad events lead people to no longer believe in god?

Ah well - such questions would require some critical thinking. I suspect if they are addressed it will be more strawmaning and/or goal shifting. SJ is very good at apologetic's.

That is not a complement.

We do not have any empirical proof of the claims SJ has made.
SJ has offered no test that can be repeated to demonstrate her claims.
And we did not see even a hint of a valid & sound argument.

Because of this, we must be skeptical, of her conclusions.

Good is good, with, or without a god.

So, I submit the idea that "good" is in fact, really for real "good" - regardless of if or if not there is or is not any god out there.

Some say that good is subjective, and it could be seen that way, as we must put a starting place somewhere. I dare say that for most humans, it would at least be to lessen human suffering, and to ensure human life (if not life of other things although that might be needed to keep humans going).
For those that do not care about human life, well - I think they would not really last to long ;)

There was a story I once read about a Monk who used a very small washcloth to clean the wood floor of a very large church. It took him all day to do it. No one had asked him to do it. When asked, he said that he did it because it was good to do it. He didn't want anything for doing it, no praise, no complement, no anything. Just doing it was enough.

When I was a Christian, I had this view - that doing good was something I must do because it proved that I loved God. Yet, sometimes I would pray that I didn't want my good things to be noticed - that God should just ignore what I did good, because I didn't want it to get me anything. I didn't want the big golden house, I just wanted a normal place, give my things to someone else. I wanted to be humble.

Latter, I would joke in bible class that I was the most humble person among them, ah humor.

But, I saw doing good in a strange way due to my Christian beliefs - you didn't need to do anything (other then believe in Jesus as your savor) to be saved. You didn't have to do good, you should do good but its only because you love God, you should do good in a hidden way, not to show off.

Yet, there was songs that said that your checkbook would show how you payed to the church and that therefor loved Jesus or things like this. Or other things like this.

Now as a skeptic, I do not believe in Jesus, or God or things of that nature. Yet I still do think that doing good - is good, that whatever good is - if you do it, then its still good.

That hope of reward, or fear of punishment should not be why you do good. That it is easy, or hard should not stop you from doing good. That you should do as much good as you possibly can, because simply - it is good to do good.

If someone gives you something for doing good, thank them, be good to them. Its okay to be good openly. In fact, doing good openly might encourage others to do good, you never know.
Even if not, you can know that it was good.

So, do good.

Emmy Hucker: A fan blog post.

Her youtube

I became aware of Emmy when Jordan Peterson tweeted a video she had done about him. His wife thought it was cute, and it was cute. Emmy is cute. All the things on her channel are cute, and I'm getting ahead of myself.

So, I watched her video, her skills at camara work, editing, voice-over, and all the things are at a level I will not reach (because I'm lazy) and are at a level that puts her over I would say, Cinemassacre level - yes, she is that good. I expect that if she got funding like James Rolfe did for his AVGN movie, I expect we would see something fantastic, most likely set in the past. I'd pay to see it, and I'd do what I could to fund it. In my view, I've not seen this level of skill in... ages. Not from any youtuber I follow at any rate. Her "ask me anything" video showcases this art.

Speaking of that video, of course I was an instant fan. I liked all the videos and watched them all. I commented on I'm pretty sure all of them. I was an Emmy fan, and darn proud of it. When she answered my question I squealed like a little girl. When she hung up on my question I laughed... then I sighed, my little heart broken just a bit, knowing that my crush would never, ever like me at all not like like anyway. Also I'm pretty old. But then again Jordan Peterson is old, and she had a crush on him. Hummm if I can be as cool as JBP I can become her crush! Ah ha! A PLAN.

No I'm far to lazy to do that... so I made my bed and made a video about it and asked Emmy to use her clip, I cleverly edited it into my silly video and now its cannon. I've called her and she's hung up on me. And I swear EVERYTIME she does anything about this she uses the thumbnail of her on the phone and it hurts every, single, time. My lament, sadness, my tears fall, into the wind they blow.

Anyway, so I'm a fan. I emailed her a bunch of questions and OMG she answered them. She had a thing to send in video about censorship and I sent her SO MANY THINGS.

So, in her video (here) she wanted a fan page. I knew what I had to do.

But, remember, I'm lazy. So Facebook wanted my info from my past Facebook because I deleted Facebook so clearly I will remember who I was friends with to make a new Facebook???!!! UWU?!
What about Instagram? Oh I have one?! The bleep? I don't remember what that is, would have to make a new one, ugh that is SO HARD. Fine, is Myspace still a thing? Oh, it is! Wow it looks different. Hmmm signing up requires a lot of info. Ya know, for a one-off joke this is going to be a lot of work, and I know I'll just make it and never do anything with it... bleep me. Wait! I have a blog! Ah-ha! I'll do that!

So, I made a fan post on my blog about Emmy. How cute she is, how wonderful her voice is. How talented and smart she is, how awesome she is, how I pine for her with my little silly crush that I should know better to have and that will not be returned. Ah, Emmy, perhaps in some other lifetime or timeline... C`est La Vie anyway, so what was I saying? I guess I'll start from the beginning of this story.

I became aware of Emmy when Jordan Peterson tweeted a video she had done about him. His wife thought it was cute, and it was cute. Emmy is cute. All the things on her channel are cute, and I'm getting ahead of myself.

So, I watched her video, her skills at camara work, editing, voice-over, and all the things are at a level I will not reach (because I'm lazy) and are at a level that puts her over I would say, Cinemassacre level - yes, she is that good. I expect that if she got funding like James Rolfe did for his AVGN movie, I expect we would see something fantastic, most likely set in the past. I'd pay to see it, and I'd do what I could to fund it. In my view, I've not seen this level of skill in... ages. Not from any youtuber I follow at any rate. Her "ask me anything" video showcases this art.

... wait

I think... I've said this all.
Sorry. I think I'm repeating myself.
I really need to start over.

So uh... I first saw Jordan Emmy on Peterson Hucker twitter where I video follow. Then I like him because he is cute.

Wait no. That is very wrong. Let me try again. I just... oh man.
I need to restart from the start.
Okay.

So.

About 13 billion years ago there was this event known as the singularity and that expanded into the cosmos (that we call universe because we are dumb I guess, the universe is all the thing around the cosmos) and a whole bunch of things happened that then made stars and big stars and stardust and elements and then at some point planets and Earth and then things happened and life was a thing and then evolution happened - oh the Earth happened about 4.54 billion years ago, I don't think I mentioned that. Anyway, so all that stuff happened then a bunch of history of humans and at some point I was born and grew up and then the INTERNET was a thing and I got on it and learned about it and it was fun and I fell in love with someone but found out love was only true in fairy tails - disappointment everywhere. BUT THEN I SAW EMMY'S FACE AND NOW I'M A BLEEVVERRRRR and then I was like, I should make a FAN PAGE so I went to my blog and started to type about her and got crazy at some point I think I lost my mind due to Emmy I think or something I don't know maybe I didn't eat enough or something.

Then I hit an infinity loop where I was posting about posting and kept going into the past to explain my post and self and then this happened ahhhhhhh!!!!111112rwklerjnaliso; sze ERROR VERY.

*explodes*



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............And that's why Emmy Hucker is the best.