On the subject of things that happened to me.

"I know you all hate me" I recall saying to people in my class way back when I was nine or ten, perhaps younger. I had two friends in that school. Each school thereafter I would only have one friend at most. It was online that I was able to make more friends. Yet, I found, that online is fleeting, people are not as much of a friend as you want to think they are, things that wouldn't end a relationship in "real life" (as if the net wasn't also part of real life) would and could and did end relationships online. Even dumb things, mostly the dumb things.

I've come from the "old school" net experience with chatroom and forums - before youtube, before twitter, before facebook and even before myspace was a "thing" oh I've been around I tell you.

What I can tell you is, people are jerks sometimes. And, sometimes they are wonderful. Words can hurt, words can help, words can be forgotten. I've had night long conversations that I forgot in full the next day - had to re-read whatever I wrote, and found that I couldn't really talk to that person, in fact, I had written most of the words, they had written little.

We let what we think the person is become a thing in our mind. (X) person is (Z) way, even if they are not. Our brain fills in the missing bits of that person.

I found romance a number of times online, and never had it pan out. Once it was a girl from the far off land of Texas who I would think of when I would play the song "Fields of gold" (done by Sting)
I would see those fields, see her run towards me, see us hug. See us love. Yet, it never came to be. She dropped me, it was over.

I've had people I really liked as a friend abandon me because we disagreed on something. I've had people betray me. In turn, I'm sure I've done this to others. I've hurt and been hurt.
Yet still, laughter could echo into the sky if we let it.

People can bring pain, or hope, or empty or full. We are strange creatures, always alone, always around others. On line, we find a new face around each corner, yet we are so far away, so distant. We can so easily forget we are a human, and they are human, and what someone is in fact. We can fail to separate our dream from reality.

Get angry online - see who sticks with you. Make a big error online, see who stands by your side. Those are the ones to call friend. Those are the ones to talk to.

So, ya want to be an advocate eh? Be sure you have some mega thick skin, because its rough out there, and its going to be. Your going to have to be together to make a difference in this world. If you break down, if you show weakness, your going to get smashed, so being an advocate for (X) might not be for you.

I've seen it as a theist and as a skeptic. I've seen insults. I've seen kind words. I've heard nonsense, I've heard facts. Its all there. Its all part of this thing. Its happening to me. Its happening to you.

Even as you read this, you are interacting with me, but you can not know me, not really, only a little, only slightly only a bit. Maybe you will want to know more, maybe.

We seek love of all kinds - friendship, romance, a unified family of our own making. We seek understanding and we want, so much, to make an impact upon this world. We want so badly to make it better, yet we have no idea how.

These are things that happened to me. These are things that happen to you.

So, well, big deal I didn't write anything you didn't know most likely, or didn't suspect, or maybe I did who knows? Did it matter? Did it make a difference? Can I make an impact? Can you? Can anyone?

As we all stumble around, trying to do this, debating over word choices, debating over everything from what we eat to how we put the TP on the roll to wipe our butts with (and how to wipe) - and we all want, I hope, to make this world a better place.

Perhaps, we do make this world a better place. Who knows. So, do you want to quit twitter or facebook or youtube? You might. You might need to for yourself - as there are ways and ways to make an impact outside of the net. I've got a message to send, are you there?

Is anyone out there? Am I alone in this? No. You are not alone.
But it can feel like that. I know.
Because this is one of the things that happened to me.
What happened to you?

I want to know. I want to share.
Lets make it better, if we can agree, we can find some way to compromise.
Hope for humanity +1 if I did my job with my humble words.
If not, well - I tried at least.

Perhaps we all must try our best. Peace works, use it. Love wins over hate. I think we must try to be the sort of human we hope others to be. Yet, can we? I do not know. I only know, this is a few things that happened to me.